ROTTEN TO THE CORE: Hereditary Angioedema (HAE)

ROTTEN TO THE CORE: Hereditary Angioedema (HAE)

Hereditary Angioedema (HAE)

I sometimes forget that I have HAE. Those are what I refer to as the good days- the days where I don't get attacks (what we call our episodes of sickness). Sometimes the good days last for months at a time. But other times the attacks are constant. Since this disease is a bit of a freak of nature to begin with (only about 1 in 150 000 are affected) it's not surprising that it's also unpredictable in it's ways. You can never really know when it's going to start but when it does... you're in for a ride.

HAE doesn't care about you. It doesn't care about your obligations, your priorities, your plans. It'll occur whenever it wants to and also last for an undetermined amount of time. An "attack" consists of the swelling of one or various parts of the body, both external and internal. Most people who have HAE don't really know what causes their attacks. Some people have theories or educated guesses about what could be causing theirs, and when they stay away from certain foods, etc that they think are the "triggers" they do see a difference. Because of this, people often compare it to an allergic reaction and let me tell you that is the worst thing you could ever say to a person who suffers from HAE. It's bad enough that nobody understands what we're going through, and that most doctors don't even know that this disease even exists or how to treat it. 
I'm constantly searching (in vain, up until now) for people who might be able to relate. I've searched for groups on Facebook, I've scoured the internet.. and here I am, thousands of Google searches later, blogging about how lonely this disease can really make you feel.

So consider this my invitation. I'm reaching out my hands. I'm extending an olive branch. If your eyes should ever happen to meet this little paragraph of words and you suffer from hereditary angioedema, or anything similar, and want to communicate with other people who feel your pain, don't hesitate.

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E-mail me: celinaflores@live.ca
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le metro de montreal...

Sometimes life is funny. You know, in the stupid, frustrating way that we all accept every single day. Sometimes it's just stupid in a way that is entirely unfunny but still just as frustrating. Like when you really start to wonder when common sense went entirely out the window. Tonight while getting on the metro after work I found an empty seat and sat down. A few stops later a woman gets on with her son. She sits beside me and continuously gives me this look that says "I want my son to sit with me, can you move?". Well first, no. I had a long ass day whether it looks like it to you or not. Your son is about 5 years younger than me. He's in better shape. He can stand. So the ride continues in this awkward manner without me knowing it was just about to get worse. A blind man gets on the train. I spot him instantly and get up off my seat to offer it to him. I keep one foot directly touching the seat so no one can sit down and I try (in vain) to reach him, tap him, get his attention to tell him he can sit down. Well the train shifted at that point so I fell a bit forward and in those split seconds, the woman's son sits down on my used-t0-be seat. I notice immediately and I look at her like, "seriously?". So I say to her, "c'est parce que... j'allais donner mon siege a le monsieur qui est aveugle", roughly translates to: this seat was not meant for your son. She attacks me right off the bat. I don't decide who sits in what seat. I can't tell her that her son can't sit there. Who do I think I am? Are you fucking kidding me?! You're reprimanding me for trying to do a good deed. Kudos to you. And great lesson you're teaching your children. And, in fact, I do decide who gets to sit in my seat when I left my seat for a specific reason. That's what public transportation is about. You can sit your fat lazy ass down for as long as you want but when a disabled/pregnant/elder/etc person gets on the train, ya move! I couldn't really believe this stupid exchange. In my eyes, it was totally unnecessary. I really didn't need to get yelled at today, much less for a reason that makes no sense at all. Whoever you are, lady, I hope you're proud of yourself.

Size 6 is The New "Fat"

I was having a conversation with my little sister about Karl Lagerfeld's comments about Adele being "beautiful... but too fat" (insert eyeroll and middle finger here). I thought that was enraging enough but she went on to tell me that recently an article had popped up on the internet saying how size 6 is the new plus size. Say what? Not only is that completely ridiculous but it's so dangerous. I mean, let's say you're one of those people who think I'm the one being completely ridiculous. Just think about it this way: what message does it send to actual plus size women when you tell them the spectrum has been broadened to include girls who in their minds are downright tiny, especially in comparison to their own selves? Is the mission to make them feel fatter, to make them feel even more that they are not accepted? And to the "new plus size" girls, is the mission to make them feel fat, period? Fat. The word itself is so... abstract. What is fat? That squishy yellow matter they always bring out on doctor shows? That little roll that sits on top of your jeans when you sit down? A few extra pounds, or a few hundred? Personally, I wish we lived in a world where no one had to be considered plus size. Why can't all women be catered to at one store? Why does one group of women "deserve" nicer clothes? Why does one group of women need their own special store? Why can't we all just co-exist without looking at the size of our bodies, without ostracizing another group of people into their own respective corners so we can pretend they don't exist. The fashion industry as a whole (whether it's Dior or Forever 21) needs to step up it's game in terms of catering to more than one type of girl. I'm afraid the end result will be a world full of eating disorders. But I'm also afraid people would be more comfortable with that.