ok.

a lot of things annoying me at this very minute. i almost choked on my fucking lip ring for the 2nd day in a row (not to mention that this has happened at least 10 times in the past 2 months). my ball keeps falling out and getting lost, but eventually i find it around my room and put it back on. well on sunday, it fell down the drain. so now i have a bar sticking out of my face, and when i eat it falls into my mouth due to the stretching of lips... i swear, that is all i needed. no, really, i promise, this is amazing :) i don't fucking have $60 to buy a new lipring just because i'm missing the ball. UGHHHH. and right now, i just have to point out that people are so so so so fucking stupid. ok. and that is IT.

please

"And if I am a number I'm infinity plus one
And if you are five words you are afraid to be the one
And if you are a number you're infinity plus one
And if I am four words then I am needing of your love .."

This past weekend was, in a word, special. I don't want the past back. Just keep this up.

i hate myself so much right now

i am having, and this is an understatement, the worst night of my life. i swear, i am missing something. something large. there's an elephant in the room. ignorance is not bliss. i'm driving myself crazy with these thoughts and speculations and assumptions. are they really all wrong?



update: yes, and also no.

big girls don't cry

the fact that we are fed this thought from (practically) the beginning of our lives makes living right now that much harder. i cry all the time, for what i find to be good reasons, so does that make me a little girl? and what made me a big girl before? and who invented the rule that crying supposedly makes you weak?

i'm pretty tired of people who think they look strong but really come across as though they have no heart.

bubblegum cocktails

The first time I went into a bar, I was 8 (my dad owned it). The last time was last night. I only drank one drink. And it was that concoction that you see up there. It's equal parts vodka, banana liqueur, strawberry liqueur and that weird red syrup (grenadine?). How does that wind up tasting like bubblegum?

I haven't the slightest clue.